Introverts vs Extroverts Stuck at Home

by Houston

For introverts: How do you keep from become too introvert-ish? It is so easy during these times to just sink into yourself. How do you care for the extroverts in your life?

For extroverts: How do you care for yourself and your introvert? How do you get enough social interaction during COVID quarantine?

73 thoughts on “Introverts vs Extroverts Stuck at Home

  1. I am pretty borderline between extrovert and introvert – leaning a bit toward the extrovert side. I really do miss getting together with friends more often – especially now that it is winter & the outdoor socializing has cut way down. But I feel like being on work calls all day is pretty draining – I am talking all day long. And I have lots of social interaction with my family and neighbors. I have much less alone time than I have ever had because we are all home 99% of the time! So I’m actually missing alone time!

    DS is the most introverted of us, and he is doing pretty well. He talks/texts/Facetimes/games with his best friends & also gets together with them outside pretty regularly. (went sledding in our 12″ of snow yesterday, for example)

    I do worry about some of my friends who live alone. That would be very, very difficult I think.

  2. DS2 hasn’t seen his friends face to face since March! He is the most introvert-ish of all of us.

    DH and DS1 are extroverts, and I am an introvert. It’s sometimes difficult to balance all of these preferences/personalities.

  3. I agree with Ivy – being on work calls all day and having family all here really makes for less alone time than I had pre-pandemic. We are fortunate to have enough space in the house for everyone to have their own room for work/school. I do miss friends, and have been fighting off a bit of depression since the holidays. I’ve been calling and texting friends and family more. I FaceTime with immediate family and now some cousins, and use the Marco Polo app with some girlfriends. DH does not put as much effort into keeping up with friends and I’ve raised this as something we need to more actively plan for before we retire. DS is doing fine because he is very connected to all his friends online. DD is impacted the most because her friends are not as online, she is staying with us to save money and we are out here in the suburbs, so a significant drive to where her friends are even if they were getting together, which they really aren’t. Hopefully things will change soon.

  4. Each of us is doing OK. The kids have gone back to school after the self quarantine post holiday break.
    There had been some wanting to hang out with friends but that will not possible until the warmer weather returns and outdoor meet ups are possible. I haven’t seen too much of my neighbors lately due to the colder weather but there has been plenty of work and family interaction that keeps me busy.

  5. I feel like someone here had posted a quiz/online assessment thing that told you how introverted/extroverted you are on a scale of 1-100. Does anyone know what I’m talking about?

    Our family is mostly all introverts – I think #3 is the most extroverted out of all of us, and she is also the one who’s been talking with her friends most online (FB messenger, hangouts mostly). The kids saw their cousins over the summer/at Thanksgiving (different sides of the family) and #2 saw a few friends while playing outdoor soccer in the fall, but we haven’t seen any of our family or couple friends in person.

    DH is probably the most introverted out of all of us, but he’s also the person who has the most video calls for work, so that makes it tough for him. I have some work calls and virtual rehearsals, which are starting to grate on my nerves since my director is decidedly NOT adapting well to the online format. I have my college roommate who I talk to on the phone, and we’ve had a couple of zoom calls with a couple of our family/couple friends. That’s it!

  6. I’m an introvert, and last week I mentioned how I have a really hard time making phone calls….so working from home with so many calls being video can be paralyzing. I just got off an hour long video call where I was presenting. My brain is fried and I basically want to take the afternoon off. Oddly enough, if I had physically gone to the client and presented face to face I’d be in better shape.

    But, I do miss seeing my friends. I have a weekly women ski night, and it is wonderful for my mental health. The other night at the outdoor ice rink I ran into some other parents and it was great chatting with them.

    DH is the extrovert and I do a lot of encouraging him to plan outdoor meetups with his friends. He got stuck in my introvert world and it doesn’t fit him. He also keeps mentioning how he can’t wait to host friends again, so I know my luck (of not entertaining) is running out.

  7. Total introvert here, and my experience was much like Ivy recounts: surprise at how *little* alone time I have. The calls and videoconferences sap all of my “other people” strength, but then I don’t have that restorative alone time because there are always PEOPLE here who want to interact with me! It’s definitely gotten better since DD went back to school, though; by comparison, the house is very quiet! DS has mellowed, too — when he first went remote, he would come talk to me at every. single. break., no matter what I was doing. Now, between having the sign on the office door that I put on “do not enter” when I’m busy, and between him chilling out and more getting into the routine, we have hours and even days that are lovely and quiet. I’m so glad that DH is going in to the office, though; if we both had to share this 9’x9′ office, it would get ugly quickly.

    My mom is struggling, given that she’s an uber extrovert who travels every week for business and whose hobby is planning future trips. We’ve developed a few habits, though, that are keeping her sane (I hope): we have dinner together once or twice a week (it was Sunday evening until DH’s/DS’s bowling league switched nights, and then whenever we have some fancy takeout or delivery we invite her); DS goes over for lunch every school day; and we do a girls’ night movie night (used to be Friday, now Sunday to coincide with bowling). That’s sort of been the perfect thing, since my mom gets people and I don’t have to interact much. We’re slowly working our way through “Death in Paradise” and have just hit Season 9, and we both (all 3 when DD is home) really look forward to a couple of episodes every week.

    I do worry a little about letting myself slide too much and just becoming a hermit. It was fine when the weather was good and we could go out on the weekend and eat on a patio or pop into a shop for a minute, but I am in total winter hibernation mode right now and enjoying it a little too much — just discovered and finished the newly-added season of “Outlander” on Netflix this weekend. I am both going stir-crazy and not actually wanting to do anything but curl up under my blanket — so instead I’m shopping online and suddenly discovering how my great-aunt ended up with her QVC fixation. And since that’s who I DON’T want to be in 20 years, I need to get my ass in gear and force myself to do something besides work that involves effort.

  8. DH is probably the most introverted out of all of us, but he’s also the person who has the most video calls for work, so that makes it tough for him.

    This is DW. At the end of the day, she just doesn’t want to talk to anyone.

    DD and I are on the introverted side. I’ve been going to work the whole time so the hard part for me is that they are always around when I’m home. Not that DW went out much in the beforetimes because of her illness, but she almost never leaves the house now unless it’s with me.

    DD hasn’t seen any of her friends since this started. She’s been volunteering at the animal shelter one afternoon a week, and she’s been going out with her aunt a bit. She is going back to school 2 days a week starting tomorrow, although they are half days so she’s not going to be gone for too long.

    I would kill for a day at home by myself.

  9. Forgot to mention: DS is doing great. The geek is strong in that one, and even pre-Covid, he hung out with his friends by playing video games together online. So his social circle has continued pretty much unabated. I know he misses seeing people in person at least some of the time, but he’s really adapted far better than I had feared

    And DD is back at school, where she NEEDS to be (for both our sanity). She has her own little pod of housemates, and they can go do things together (yesterday they apparently decided to drive to Greensboro to check out an Asian market there), so she gets her extrovert fix, I get regular texts so know she’s enjoying herself, and I also know she’s a total rule-following germophobe and so don’t have to worry about her being stupid.

    Although Dad did introduce her to rum this break, and she liked the pina coladas and mojitos. . . . But even if she started going to frat parties (totally not her personality), they wouldn’t be serving *good* liquor there anyway. ;-)

  10. DS seems to be doing fine at school. They are opening things up a bit, although his classes are still all online. They are now having photography club meetings twice a week, he started intramural spike ball this weekend and signed up for intramural cornhole. He’s joining the dorm activities committee since they are cleared to start having some gatherings. And they got two suitemates to replace the one who left, and they are apparently quite social. One of them introduced DS to hard lemonade, and he said he understands why I like hard cider now. He didn’t believe when I told him they are quite different.

    And in some totebagginess, he is taking some extra classes this semester because several of them are 8 weeks. Then if he takes 7 credits over the summer, he’ll be a junior for the fall semester.

  11. Lemon Tree – Take the afternoon off. After giving online presentations, I even go so far as to take a nap afterwords. Exhausting!

  12. I have an internal role. My team doesn’t like the camera, so we can talk and share screens but no camera. I tried to get a small group to turn on their cameras – the extroverts and tech comfortable people did, no luck with the rest. The good thing about this, is I don’t have to be camera ready.

  13. “I would kill for a day at home by myself.”

    DW left a little before noon yesterday and will be home for dinner on Saturday. I’d invite you over, but that would kinda defeat the purpose of me having the place to myself, doing everything on my schedule. E.g. I do my workout right after work, generally an hour, and I make myself ready for dinner by 7 because DW doesn’t like to eat too late/close to bedtime. Alone, I take my time with my workouts, post workout cleanup, and get around to dinner 8pm at the earliest, usually more like 9pm (learned that in Madrid).

    I’d like to have a beer with friends; doing it virtually won’t cut it. I’m mostly introvert so being here just the two of us has been fine, but I do need more socialization.

  14. I just finished a book about making work places more introvert friendly. A bit full of corporate jargon speak but it had some good ideas. Creating Introvert Friendly Workplaces by Jennifer Kahnweiler, PhD. The author states she is an extrovert and the tone of the book does reflect that. Not too offputting but noticeable.

  15. I had more alone time over the summer when DS was playing baseball with DH coaching. While I went to a lot of the home games, I didn’t go to the away games or practices. I am really missing that alone time. It was just a few hours at a time – perfect.

    I really miss the most some of the things that will be last to come back – crowded ball games/hockey games, concerts, museums (especially special exhibits), cutting out at 4 for happy hour with coworkers on a Friday, grabbing a beer at a taproom on a Saturday afternoon, etc. DH & I were just lamenting that DS is finally at the age where we could leave him home while we go to a hockey game together, and that makes me a little sad that there won’t be any until the fall (most likely). I don’t miss as much the day-to-day interactions with random coworkers in the break room – I have replaced that with getting to know the neighbors better, and I really like that.

  16. “I do worry a little about letting myself slide too much and just becoming a hermit.”

    Same here!

  17. Denver, +1000. I didn’t really get into just how DRAINING the kids are – it’s a more hectic second shift than usual because by the time they hit dinner, they haven’t talked with people most of the day and so they all talk at once. Plus every time they come downstairs from school, they have to interrupt my work and talk at me. So exhausting!

    This coming weekend we will finally be able to see my parents again (they broke quarantine protocol and then we had an ortho appt for #1, so it’s been several weeks) and I hope that takes some of the pressure off. I’m also hoping to send the kids to their house for an overnight – we had one of those in the fall for our anniversary and it was MAGICAL. We’ve also been having our nanny tuck them in over facetime once a week during my rehearsal, so that keeps some continuity.

  18. I’m an introvert, and as shared on here before, I’m probably a little worried about how easily I’ve adopted this new smaller world. I actually love being home at night to watch tv with DH. I miss travel, but the reduced demands on my day to day schedule has me daydreaming about how soon I can retire. I’m only 51, it’s not soon.

    On a kind of related note, I had a shot of inspiration yesterday. I currently have my home office in a small room in our basement (walk out basement fully finished), but my room has no windows. When we built, it was a playroom. Now, it’s my little get away, with an old recliner, big tv, treadmill and desk. I realized that my kids have both moved out, so I’m going to claim one of their rooms and flip my “office” to become their bedroom. It’s a big room and I’m having some fun imagining how to make it my little retreat. This makes me the exact opposite of a doting mother who leaves the room unchanged for years (or forever). My DH is just okay with the idea, and my son will probably be a little sad. However, given that he spends about 5 nights a year here, and I spend all day every day here, it seems reasonable. Have any of the rest of you recent empty nesters appropriated the kids rooms back for other uses?

  19. I miss going into the office for the small office talk, but I do not miss having an extrovert manager who tried to act like she understands how to relate to an introvert. :)

    I’ve noticed that my kids no longer like to go to stores or run errands with me…even when I’m bribing them with treats. In the Before Times they loved going out with me and just being out in public. Now it is pulling teeth to get them to go anywhere with me. Maybe it is their age, or maybe they have just gotten so used to being hermits, and both my kids are extroverts. This weekend they needed passport photos (we aren’t going anywhere, but their passports expired), and then we stopped at the pet store, and another nearby store. You would have thought I was kidnapping them. So much whining. Photos taken, which they both referred to as mug shots, and appointment later this week, which I already warned them they have to leave the house for.

  20. “Have any of the rest of you recent empty nesters appropriated the kids rooms back for other uses?”

    I was just joking about this with DH this weekend, because I have NO room to put the toys I want. I recently had an opportunity to take both an air hockey table AND a pool table that someone needed to get rid of before a move, and we just couldn’t find room for them — the logical space would be the front room that was the kids’ play room and is now the game room, but (a) there’s not a huge amount of space there to start with (since we still need the small sofa and gaming chairs), and (b) DS has added a desk and taken it over for school, because it’ less depressing than spending all day in his room. So I joked that we could just kick out the kids and take over both rooms for toys.

    Of course, he’s 15, and she’s home from college A LOT, so that wouldn’t exactly win me any “good mom” awards. . . .

  21. @LT – DS whines and complains anytime he has to leave the house not of his own accord, but that really isn’t much different from The Before Times. He’s never really liked going out to dinner or shopping or anything like that.

  22. I straddle both worlds, but I think I must lean extrovert because I miss my friends. I can’t even get DH to pick up food or leave the house except to walk to the mail. He doesn’t seem to care about being at home as much I care about it.

    DD used to be more of an extrovert. We met friends and neighbors through her when she was younger because she talked at an early age. Parents would introduce themselves to me at weekend bday parties or even in the mall because they knew her from preschool or other classes. She is still an extrovert, but she also needs down time and that it is an introvert quality. She desperately misses her friends and I know that she can’t wait until it warms up so she can go back to meeting them in backyards etc. She talks to her friends via FaceTime or other, but she really misses the FTF contact with other kids. Some of my girlfriends have kids that selected remote only for the third quarter instead of hybrid because they are true introverts and they love the stay at home option. A few of them said their kids never go outside for days or even weeks unless it is for a driving lesson.

  23. DH is beyond introvert. His external life is online. He leaves the house once every 2 weeks when the cleaners come and enjoys a restaurant meal, and if we cant schedule them on that day occasionally for a medical test or appt. And with the little team of cats and his favorite 24-7 “home health aide” everything is just fine for him. I go out as much as possible. I have a weekly meetup, weather permitting, with a local friend and/or the grandkids. I run errands inefficiently and chat with the cashiers. I keep my personal care appointments and chat during those too. I talk on the phone and text and face time when I can. I miss the hugs from family and friends and the people density of normal daily life, but at least I have a spouse and pets. DD1 has her cousin as roommate and DD2 is fostering cats. Sons have wives and kids/dog respectively.

  24. @Lauren – I go stir crazy sitting in the house all day. DH & I go for a LOT of walks (3-5/day), and I think that helps. Fresh air, chit chat with neighbors, change of scenery, moving around. I was climbing the walls yesterday because it was snowing too hard to go out as much as usual – and I still went out for one walk and did some indoor workouts.

  25. Upthread several distinguished between strong introversion and needing down or decompression time. I know there are many folks who enjoyed their lengthy commutes because that was a good wind down. I sort of need outings and conversation and physical touch as relief from the routine and quiet time. I am not an extrovert, but a hermits life would kill me..

  26. “I have NO room to put the toys I want.”

    Wouldn’t you have lots of room if you’d gone ahead and bought your dream house?

  27. “I know there are many folks who enjoyed their lengthy commutes because that was a good wind down.”

    What I miss most about not going to the office is the bike commute. The ride home was not just a mental wind down, it was also a physical wind down.

  28. “But would she then have the money to buy the toys?”

    Definitely, in the case of the air hockey table AND a pool table that someone needed to get rid of before a move.

  29. I used to think I’m an introvert, but then I read posts here about how people need to recover after F2F time and how draining that is for them; that’s not me. Unlike them, I can get energized by F2F interactions.

    I’m curious how I’ve come across to those who’ve met me IRL– introvert or not?

    Perhaps I’m a different type of introvert. During lunch I’ll ready the article RMS linked and see if that’s the case.

  30. I don’t really relate to any of those. I do like a balance of time with others and time alone – but seeing as I have NO time truly alone right now, it’s hard to say how much is ideal. And I like parties and bars, I like meeting new people, and I don’t find socializing to be stressful. But I do enjoy spending time by myself – whether by myself in a crowd like going to a museum or movie alone or truly alone – like in my house.

  31. F2F interactions with people you love and find interesting are energizing, especially in very small groups. Everything else is exhausting. And even the F2F interactions with loved ones sometimes require a recovery period. I don’t like staying in other people’s houses for a variety of reasons, but one of them is the omnipresence of the host, even if you adore the host.

  32. RMS – I also hate staying at other people’s houses. I find that other people keep their houses too hot and you can’t turn it down (unless like L’Abbey you have so many heating zones). At my BIL and SIL’s house it’s too hot and we have to stay in the basement with NO BATHROOM on that floor, which is really the worst.

  33. “I have a weekly women ski night”

    Is there a nearby ski area with night skiing? I’m envious.

    A while back, I was considering a week-long training class for work, and looking at where the class was offered. It was during winter, and I was figuring on taking it in Seattle, because I heard there was easily accessible night skiing. People I’d met from the area talked about going skiing after work. But that fell through, and I’ve never been able to find a situation that afforded me that sort of skiing opportunity.

  34. “I sort of need outings and conversation and physical touch as relief from the routine and quiet time. I am not an extrovert, but a hermits life would kill me..”

    I’m like Meme. I’m very much an introvert, but I’ve mentioned how much I miss the small but regular interactions that I used to have with people at the Y, at church, at the office, and around town. I don’t entertain much, because having people over for hours at a time tends to exhaust me (even if I really like the people I’m with), but the shorter day-to-day interactions energize me. There is no good way to replicate those online. For me, that has been the hardest part of this pandemic.

  35. “I don’t like staying in other people’s houses for a variety of reasons, but one of them is the omnipresence of the host, even if you adore the host.”

    I’m like this, too. But I am married to an extrovert who likes to visit and stay with friends a couple of times each year (absent Covid). I find those weekends exhausting beyond belief, because I feel I have to be socially “on” from the moment I wake up until the moment I go to bed.

  36. Don’t get too excited Finn. It is 10 minutes from my house, but it is extremely small. It is great for a few hours with friends after work, but not at all challenging. You do get a great view of the city skyline light up at night. Great for kids and cheap…drop the kids off, and swing by a few hours later and pick them up. It is run by the county parks department and they know their limitations – so they cater to youth racing and terrain park. If I was a kid, I would have LOVED the terrain park.

  37. Thanks for clarifying, Lemon Tree. I was wondering about your ski hill, too!

    I think I’m a blend of introvert/extrovert. I love my alone time but I also like spending time with friends, even if it’s a virtual happy hour or a walk. I still walk (via conference call) with a former group of work friends once or twice a week during lunch.

    Last weekend DH and I had an outdoor meet-up with friends on their front porch. The temps were in the 20’s. The first hour was fine, the second hour we wrapped in blankets, and we ended 30 minutes later because the sun was setting and we were all getting cold. Even so, it was it was great to take a drive and see some different faces.

    The group I’m working in now has 30 minute coffee breaks 3 times a week on Zoom. Attendance is mandatory and we’re not supposed to talk about work but it usually creeps in anyway. It’s kind of weird. Sometimes there’s an awkward silence. I really don’t want to chit chat; just leave me alone and let me get my work done.

  38. I hate staying at other people’s houses as well. I want a little space before bed and before I get ready in the morning, and rarely does my sleep schedule align with others. It is a LOT. I also agree with L – the temperature is never to my preference, the guest rooms are usually not as nice as a hotel, and I worry about disturbing people getting up to pee or get a drink of water between “bedtime” and “wakeup time”.

    @LT – I remember fondly going to Mount Kato with snowboard club in the evenings when I was in college. It was a small hill and a small chalet, but it was so much fun. Only occasionally did we make the trek to Buck Hill. Night skiing/snowboarding was always fun though, even though it is pretty cold at night in Minnesota.

  39. Ivy, my DH took a long walk everyday until the cold weather arrived. He is exercising a lot using the tread and bike, but I know he wants to get back outside. I don’t mind the cold if it is sunny, but he would rather not deal with a heavy coat and mask etc. I’ve been double masking for about two weeks. It is another covid silver lining because it keeps me warm.

    It is still snowing here, but we did two college visits and DD studied for the ACT. Virtual tours of Northwestern and Wisconsin. There was also a live session at Wisconsin that was great because it was a mix of accepted seniors and interested juniors on the webinar so the questions were better than usual.

    DD is still undecided about whether she is willing to travel via plane to attend college so I am not sure if she will even apply to either school. I doubt she would ever get accepted to Northwestern, but it is so easy to explore these schools since everything is online.

  40. I’m an extroverted introvert. If I’m out I will interact like crazy and be the last to leave the party but Im happy as a clam at home. With my nest emptying out I’m pleasantly surprised at how much I enjoy my own company and how I’ve found some amazing creative endeavors to fill my time. I’d like the pandemic to be over so I can see my folks and people don’t suffer, but on a personal level, I could keep doing this for quite some time. I guess I get comfort from discovering that I am enough for me.

  41. I’ll be the weird one and say I like staying at other people’s houses, assuming I like the people.

  42. I am somewhere in the middle of an introvert and an extrovert. I have always been surrounded by people. Growing up, I created my own space by reading books. It was difficult in a country and society that functions in close quarters to other people and is group centric. It’s one reason I wanted to get away. I like talking to and getting to know people but it takes a long time for me to develop meaningful relationships. Those relationships that I have, I maintain over the years. So, I have fewer friends but those that I have, I maintain.

  43. Lemon, if it’s anything like Mount Kato, that would be exciting to me. These days I’m happy to get in any skiing, and most of the skiing I’ve been doing in the last several years has been easy intermediate runs,

    The images of Mount Kato remind me of Boreal Ridge, which BITD was one of only two ski areas in the Tahoe area with night skiing. I skied there several times at night, and enjoyed it.

    Night skiing is inherently limited to runs that can be lit, and IME is typically some easy runs near the base. But at night the snow tends to dry out, and crowds thin out, which can make for a lot of fun.

  44. I will stay at my best friend’s house when I visit him…we’ve only known each other since before some of you were born, so we’re pretty comfortable with each other. But others’ places? not so much.

    Lauren -I think it’s supposed to warm up Thurs/Fri, enough to get outside if the walking surfaces are clear. I plan to go outdoors for my walk on Friday.

    In order of my preference for doing lengthy walks: Outside, by a large margin, Gym treadmill, Home treadmill. I have nothing against treadmills, and plenty of entertainment both places, but I find I can more comfortably walk faster outside than indoors on a treadmill.

  45. I have been sad to read in the local paper at the number of restaurants closing. The cup cake shop that was a part of my kids childhood is closing. The Great Recession resulted in a lot of closures. We had just moved here at the time . Now there is another wave of closures. Our city center doesn’t have many residents. All the restaurants there depended on the office crowd. With WFH there is no foot traffic at all.

  46. Fred, thanks for the info and the offer. That looks like somewhere I could have fun.

    It’s also near a company I’ve had to take training from. Had I known about that ski area, I might have chosen to take my training there rather than Las Vegas.

  47. Per the article RMS posted, I’m a social introvert. I’ll hang out with small group of friends, but I’m not eager to socialize. We have new neighbors and it took a lot of courage for me to go over and introduce myself. I grew up in a house of extroverts and my family definitely didn’t understand my behavior. Like Louise, I hid out in books.

  48. We are a family of introverts and we have enjoyed not having weekend commitments. Although I do miss meeting up with friends periodically. I started a book club last fall. Unfortunately, we were only able to meet once before we were put into lockdown. I’m sad I haven’t been able to develop those friendships.

    Even before the pandemic I used to say that my dream was to be a hermit. I would love to be the little, old lady at the end of the block who kept to herself and died with a cagillion dollars in the bank!!

  49. How are those in the northeast doing? My brother said they got about 30 inches in NW NJ. I hope everyone is safe.

  50. “In order of my preference for doing lengthy walks: Outside, by a large margin, Gym treadmill, Home treadmill. I have nothing against treadmills, and plenty of entertainment both places, but I find I can more comfortably walk faster outside than indoors on a treadmill.”

    It’s much easier for me to walk faster on a treadmill, which is where I do most of my walking. Outside I have to slow down or stop depending on the location and if I encounter other people. Even on the walking path near me I encounter enough people that it slows me down. The ones who walk two or three abreast are the most annoying IMO. However, I’m starting a 30-day challenge (remember those?) to walk outside every day, even just a little. It’s probably good for my mental health.

    We didn’t lose power. We received about 2′ of snow but the winds never seemed to gust up as much as predicted.

  51. I was reading AAM yesterday and one of the letters was “why do people have meetings that could just be an email” and I thought of the introvert/extrovert divide. I have a couple of coworkers who *always* call me (after like 5 emails to set up the call) instead of emailing and then it’s a 2 minute phone call. So annoying!

  52. LOL Finn/Rocky. ;-)

    I am apparently both a Social and Thinking introvert. Whatever that means. Unless you want me to “mingle” in a giant room full of people. Then I become the Anxious introvert and shut down completely.

    I like hanging out with my family, because then I can talk or not talk, and it doesn’t matter. My new favorite thing we’ve done is have a Zoom call and all play “Among Us” together at the same time, so we can chat and laugh and get insanely competitive all at the same time. And it avoids that whole “so, what have you been up to” awkwardness of forced interaction.

    The problem I am having with the past 11 months is that my version of depression manifests in withdrawal and lethargy. Which basically describes the last 11 months. Which is why I worry about being a little TOO happy doing nothing and going nowhere — I’m always sort of watching myself make decisions and evaluating whether I’m legitimately grabbing down time that I need or letting the beast creep back in. So far so good, but it is weird to know you can’t necessarily trust your own judgment. Luckily, DH is more of an extrovert, so making sure he’s happy enough under the circumstances is my motivation to get out.

    So last night I had a total ADHD moment. I recently decided to try making Peking duck, so yesterday afternoon (since I was bored out the wazoo with my work) I decided to get that going. When I got the duck out, I realized it still had a number of little baby quills below the skin — sort of like if you got a buzz cut and then had to go back and pull the hair out by the roots. So I sat down with tweezers and pretty much lost the next 2 hrs. All of a sudden, it was after 6 and time to get ready to go to my mom’s for dinner.

    This better be a %^%!& delicious duck. ;-)

  53. L, I have a counterpart that is a SME so I have to keep emailing her very specific questions. She’ll always call to respond. Last week I finally told her that the content of this subject is difficult for me to comprehend just hearing it, and that I learn best by reading, and could she please send a recap in writing. I’m hoping that going forward she’ll stop calling me.

  54. Snow was very different by zip code. City that borders us on the southeast got 3 in. Town that borders north west got 12. We are halfway up the hill between the two. We got about 5. Grandkids are west of us and got 15. I think L and NoB got about a foot but the accumulations are so localized that I am just guessing from the regional map.

  55. It looks like we got at least a foot of heavy, wet snow, and we’re apparently going to get more throughout the day today. My kids’ district called a full-remote day today (so the kids are doing a full day of school online), but DH’s district called a snow day (no school at all). DD in particular is very bitter that DH gets a snow day while she doesn’t.

  56. Update: DH just got in from doing some shoveling, and he reports that we got well over a foot of snow. He said that he was chatting earlier with a friend of his who lives about five miles away from us, and the friend reported that he barely got an inch. Apparently the vast difference is due to the fact that the friend lives right on the water, while we’re a few miles inland.

  57. We have about 16 inches of snow. I was just outside because I was working on my driveway and the snow is light. There is some precipitation that is falling, but it isn’t snow. It is just wet moisture.DD has remote learning today, but she really enjoyed the snow day on Monday. The high winds were not an issue so there doesn’t seem to be any reason for another snow day since everyone can access the classes via the remote option.

  58. I think we got about a foot, maybe a bit more. I’ll wait to see the NWS totals. No more snow coming down here though :(

  59. We got about a foot of snow, it’s was light and fluffy, so hoping to go snowshoeing late this afternoon. Sunset is finally after 5pm!

    I had mentally written off skiing this year since I normally wouldn’t ski in state, but since we have fresh powder and sunny weather coming on Thursday (and DD finishes school early on Thursdays) I booked half day lift passes for us at a little place called Ski Sundown up on the MA border. There are two smaller ski hills closer, but it’s worth the drive up there for something just a bit bigger. For all the time we’ve been at home, I feel as though I haven’t spent much time with her and I’m really looking forward to the drive up there and spending some one-on-one time with my girl.

    In totebag news, she was scheduled to take the ACT on Saturday, but received an email yesterday from ACT Customer Care (that made me roll my eyes a bit) saying she is no longer able to take the test. Three possible reasons: test center closed, test center had reduction in capacity, or registered at an unlisted center established only to test specific examinees. She is in a holding queue now. Should we go to her account now and try to rebook her asap?

    After hearing some of you comment about cancelled SAT and ACT tests, I thought that we were in better shape, but apparently not. I hope none of your HS kids have this issue.

  60. My kids school has snow days built so, they never had to take any days from Spring Break in Before Times. Spring Break is sacred and cannot be touched. Now, with no snow so far and option for remote school available, they are doling out time off by having things like late start. I think the late starts are not helpful, having a full day off or ending the school year earlier by a few days will be good.

  61. Swim – I would rebook for a future date. Many colleges haven’t announced if Class of 2022 is test optional or not. Testing is messed up with so many closures.

  62. “I forgot who said they track how often they wear their clothes, but someone else did the same thing and of course had to post the results.”

    That was Lark. So I started doing it for 4 or 5 months when she mentioned it, but then I abruptly stopped last March when the world came to standstill. Maybe I should still do it with my athleisurewear that is my normal work uniform now, but it seemed silly when I first started wearing joggers everyday.

  63. Yes, that was me. I also stopped in March when I pretty much just wore running clothes every day. (In fact, I have on jeans today for the first time in a month.)

    It is interesting to me how for some people here life is totally different, and for others it is not. Our kids are in school in-person, and DH of course still goes to work in-person. And I’ve worked from a home office for 15 years. So in terms of our day-to-day, nothing is dramatically different. It’s our weekends that really feel different with no eating out, very few in-person errands, and no dinner parties. But the work and school week really has not changed.

  64. “Maybe I should still do it with my athleisurewear that is my normal work uniform now”

    I am laughing at this as applied to my current work uniform of one pair of shorts (black), two pair of legging shorts (black), four pair of leggings (two black, one blue, one deep red and lined), two soft Athleta long-sleeved shirts (black/teal), one super-soft zipped sweatshirt (deep reddish purple), and four quarter-zip sweatshirts (UT, Ravens, big poofy Louisville, black with soft fleecy lining). Oh, and one pair of slippers and three pair of slipper socks. I actually just bought the same Athleta shirt in two additional colors to add some variety (particularly for things that look slightly nicer than sweatshirts for client calls).

    My version of tracking is “is it in the clean laundry pile or the dirty laundry pile?” ;-)

  65. I always used to plan my outfits for the week on Sunday nights – and then I’d get out & steam/iron anything that needed it & arrange things in my closet. Yes, I am a planner by nature, but I also did not have the bandwidth to do this in the mornings for work so it was great.

    I still loosely plan what I am going to wear during the week – based on whether or not I will likely need to be on camera on a particular day and also based on weather. Weather is really the biggest driver now. e.g., this week, it is going to be freezing rain/snow on Thursday and then Friday extremely cold – so I need to keep some leggings aside for Thursday to make it easier to wear tall boots for my walks, and I need to make make sure to ‘save’ my warmest pants for Friday. I have a big “on camera” meeting tomorrow, so I’m setting aside my favorite zoom shirt for that. But I don’t steam/iron anything anymore. I do wear nicer clothes for “work” than for “bedtime”. I don’t work in PJ’s or full on sweatpants. I need that split during the day between work and nighttime.

  66. Interesting… a lot of what this person describes is similar to what introverts here have posted.

    :”We would limit social contact and avoid certain environments because they were exhausting or overstimulating, and we often found ourselves apologizing and feeling shame. We were in a perpetual state of anxiety because of how challenging it was for us to be in public.”

    It also made me think of NoB, and how she is the counterpoint to this with her discomfort with not being able to see and read people’s expressions.

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